My wife’s boobs and I are really taking the time to communicate and understand each other better and better. For the first number of years of our marriage, there were many elements we communicated very well. And one area around sex and our intimacy that we had terrible communication.
I could never communicate my needs, wants and desires. And she would get triggered and defensive every time I brought up anything around my sexual wants and desires. It was so incredibly frustrating and humiliating and defeating for me. I felt like such a loser that my wife wasn’t really attracted to me sexually and didn’t care about my wants and desires and became immediately triggered when I would even mention them.
I saw this week how I had some emotional beliefs that went something like this: For me to voice my sexual wants and desires was to break up our family. And keeping our family together was and is super important to me.
My wife and I now understand each other in the realms of sexuality and just this month she is starting to be able to listen and receive my sexual wants and desires. It means more to me than anything in the world.